Why you should not let your relationship status define your personality

I think one of the biggest problems in today’s world is how sexualised it is. At every corner, you’re told that you have to do this or that to get partners easily and be happy. But as someone who has had several girlfriends over the years, i must say, that statement, that having girlfriend equals happiness, couldn’t be further from the truth. Especially with the social media, where people like to parade themselves and their significant others, and do their best to make themselves and their relationship look perfect. While in truth, they’re constantly fighting and not getting along. Most of the people are this way, and when they see people like me, who choose to stay single until we find someone who we can actually click with, they see us as weird and strange. In modern world, being lonely is seen as sign of weakness, while i can argue that it is the opposite. I think being alone is the best time to explore yourself and define your character. When you’re around a group of friends or in relationship, you tend to compromise part of your beliefs. And i don’t thinking adapting to fit in is something to be ashamed of, we all do it at some level. But at some point, it gets unhealthy and you have to really look out to notice it. That’s what was happening to me before i got out of my last relationship and that’s why i choose to remain single for a while now.

 So now, my best advice would be to go out and do you. If you like golf like i do, go out and spend the money that you were supposed to spend on your girlfriend on something you actually like, like golf clubs for me. You’ll surely be pressured by society to get a partner, and it will run so deep that you’ll notice yourself getting self conscious, feeling that you are not good enough to get someone. But always remember that it’s just a choice you’re making to develop yourself by taking time off. Go out and have fun, with your friends or alone. Having no friends is whole another topic, and i won’t discuss it here. For me, that having fun was hanging out on golf course with my friends and playing golf for most of my free time. It was really liberating and one of the best decisions i’ve made in my life, as it allowed me think everything through and get back  on track with my life.

 I’m not advocating against women here, as there are both kinds of women – the ones that will push you to become better, and the ones who will affect you negatively. I’m just saying that even if you aren’t able to find good one yet, you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it and continue living your life until that one enters your life. Just don’t allow society to shame you into entering relationship if you don’t like the person, i guess that’s all i was trying to say with this.

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